Mature content warning:
The title of this post is “Hock a loogie.” It’s got pictures. Proceed at your own risk!
You expect it from boys.
It’s immortalized in poetry:
What are little boys made of?
Snips and snails and puppy dogs’ tails.
That’s what little boys are made of!
What are little girls made of?
Sugar and spice and everything nice.
That’s what little girls are made of!
It comes in Christmas letters. We got this in a Christmas letter this year:
“He is all boy and has had an excellent year learning to appreciate the passing of gas in all its forms and the value of a booger for grossing out cootie infested girls.”
My sister makes all sorts of claims about the injustice she had to endure in sharing the basement with me (a boy, of all things). I’m sure part of it’s true, but most of it is probably the exaggeration of memory over time.
So with three daughters and one son, you’d think my exposure would be limited. Not so.
We were driving home from church today with a car full of noisy children and Jessica started hacking and gagging. She does have a flair for the dramatic.
She started fumbling with the window control, but I keep the window locks on so that they don’t drive me crazy with the windows. So I hit the button to roll down the window. It was that or listen to her gag and sputter for the next six miles.
And at 35 miles an hour she spits … and doesn’t clear the car.
It’s really my fault. The suburban had a low tire yesterday so I took it to the gas station to pump up the tire. It was pretty grimy from the road chemicals and needed gas (I’m pretty sure Jenny plans it that way), so I filled it up and decided to wash it. Then came the loogie.
Everybody started going on about how gross it was. I chanced a glance over my shoulder at the window and could see the spit being blown across my formerly-clean car with the wind.
But I couldn’t see the loogie. Jenny told me she could see it in her mirror, but I didn’t see what the big deal was — until I got home.
Pictures don’t do it justice. You had to be there and see the three-dimensional blob. But pictures are all you get on the blog. Unless you hock a loogie on the computer screen when you see it. You’ve been warned.
Hock a loogie
#1 by Jessica on January 18th, 2009
Quote
This is so unfair! All this fuss over a little spit. Hasn’t EVERYONE spit out a window!? Gosh! Seriously people!
#2 by Jessica on January 18th, 2009
Quote
How was I supposed to know it would hit the car? >:(
#3 by mindy on January 19th, 2009
Quote
Not bad for a girl…hey, not bad for a guy either! Way to score one for the team, Jessica!
#4 by Anna on January 19th, 2009
Quote
Don’t worry Jess, they’re overreacting. I threw-up out the window 3 years ago and it hit the car door, it was GROSS! A little spit against a little barf, spit is better.
#5 by ~mac_&_cheez~ (maddie) on May 24th, 2009
Quote
this wuz awesome…..jess u r dramatic! lol!